Telsales Tips to Hook Readers - 2. Pitch it before you post it.

Last post I discussed the danger of having too many open questions in your first pages, because customers haven’t signed up for a survey and they don’t owe you their time to complete one. (For more on what on earth I’m talking about, see the post here:  (http://beyondthehourglassbridge.blogspot.com.au/2012/03/hooking-readers-with-dullest-subject.html) This post I’m talking about one of my favorite catch-phrases: pitch it before you post it. Despite frequent eye-rolls from the sales rep’s I teach it to, this one’s important. (And for my next trick, I shall attempt to segue into how it’s relevant in a book)...

Just because the customer hasn’t seen the information pack and has no idea what the call is about, doesn’t excuse stalling the call flow to confirm their address and re-send the brochure. People don’t expect you to grab their interest and they’re not going to wait around hoping, so whack ‘em with a few tantalizing features (aka pitch it), then get to the nitty-gritty later (aka post it! See?). In story terms this means not explaining your character’s entire life story and all their particular emotional traits within the first page. It means not stalling the writing to intricately describe the way something works in the fantastical world you’ve created. Instead, it means giving them little snippets of what’s to come, without going over the top.

The reason I say don’t go over the top is because in the same way that too many questions can take a story from intriguing to just confusing, too many answers can do the same thing.

So how do you stop a stop-action explanation in its tracks?

• Read through your opening pages and note every new piece of information you deliver.
• For each piece ask yourself, am I only telling this to the reader because I feel obliged to at this point? If I cut this, will it still make sense? If the answer to either of these is yes, you might wish to consider weaving the information in more naturally somewhere else.
• If one of the new pieces of information in your list is a description, can you cut it down so the reader gets a thumbnail image that doesn’t interrupt the flow? (Don’t mourn the details you’ve cut – a good way to bring reality to your writing is to scatter those details throughout it later on. For example you could spend your opening paragraphs explaining that your protagonist has long, unkempt blonde hair, riddled with split ends because she plays with it constantly whenever she’s nervous - and see how that stops the action. Or you could create a thumbnail by showing that she’s blonde, and then halfway through the chapter you could show her picking apart her split ends, to build tension as well as a stronger mental image). 
• If the new information on your list is delivered through dialogue, read it aloud. Does it match the character’s personality for them to say that, or are they just saying it to tell the reader?

The idea is that unless a piece of information is important to the story right then and there, you might want to consider getting rid of it or working it in another way. But again, keep an open mind as you do so. Don’t just say ‘nope, that has to go in the first page and I’m not changing it.’ Say ‘ok, so I definitely need this information here, but what if this character says it instead… or what if this happens to show it… or what if…?’

Who knows what if? That’s your job. :)

Like this post? Part 3 coming soon...

P.S. This is a new blog. Anything you could do to spread the word would be much appreciated. Thanks!

Telesales Tips to Hook Readers - 1. Nobody Likes A Survey

Life insurance. It may not sound exciting, but as an insurance tele-sales coach it's my job to turn a yawn into a yes, and there are certain sales techniques to make that task a lot easier. When we’re writing, our job is the same. We have to convince the customer our product is worth their time and money. So while there are a million rules on how to write, sometimes it pays to look at how to sell.

And yes, you can hook readers without resorting to free steak knives.

So here’s a salesperson’s guide to turning boredom into boo-yah. It might make the difference between readers hanging on, or hanging up--  --  --

1. Nobody Likes A Survey

Have you ever watched a poor main character struggling against bad cop bad cop in your favourite crime show and thought ‘that looks like fun?’ No, neither have I. We know mystery and suspense can create some of the best introductions of all, but imagine yourself as a sales rep., and your reader as the customer who ducked out of work to answer your call. The first thing to note is that THE CUSTOMER HASN’T SIGNED UP FOR A QUIZ.

Example: “Have you thought about life cover? No? Why? Well what about this?”

See what I mean? Do you? Really? J Jokes aside, using too many questions is rude, invasive, and leaves the customer wondering why they’re doing all the work to keep the conversation going. They don’t want to be stuck trying to understand the point of your call, and the same could be said of readers starting your book. Intrigue is great – but if you have too many questions and no promise of answers, they'll just hang up.So what if you said it like this?

“I’m following up a letter sent to you about a new life cover with a few extra features you can use yourself. Just wanting to run through the benefits to answer any questions and save you some time.”

You’ve still got the mystery with the ‘extra features’ but you’ve given the customer a hint, saying they can use the features themselves. The difference may seem tiny, even obvious, but recently I discussed this with a new agent who had made two sales in three weeks. He wrote it down and made three sales that day.

So how do you know whether you're being intriguing or confusing?

• Go through your opening paragraph/page/chapter and write down every question you introduce.

• Of each question ask yourself/a critique partner: would you care enough about the answer to stick around and wait?

• If yes, great! 

• If no, consider removing it or possibly introducing it later, as a separate plot arc. Maybe it can tie in to a scene you already know is a bit flat? Maybe the question can be raised by another character, to build their personality at the same time? Consider every possible option. You never know where it could go.

However you choose to play out your mysteries, remember that the easiest answer to a list of questions is ‘don’t know, don’t care’. And if readers are saying that about your opening pages, it’s a sure sign they won't be signing up today.




Like this post? Part 2 coming soon...

P.S. This is a new blog. Anything you could do to spread the word would be much appreciated. Thanks!